what is time
Jun. 12th, 2023 11:40 pmI'm starting to think the worst thing about this illness and/or the meds I take for it isn't the tiredness or the fatigue or the occasionally really powerful nausea or the overheating or or or or or but instead to absolute fucking time-blindness.
There is no time, only Not Now. Sometimes I am allowed a glimpse of Now, but mostly everything is Not Now.
When are things happening? Not Now. Is that soon, is that far? It's Not Now. Am I hungry, should I eat? Not Now. Am I tired, should I sleep? Not Now. Do I have things to do? Not Now. Do I have deadlines? Not Now.
What time is it? Not Now.
What day, what month, what year? Not. Now.
There is no time, only Not Now. Sometimes I am allowed a glimpse of Now, but mostly everything is Not Now.
When are things happening? Not Now. Is that soon, is that far? It's Not Now. Am I hungry, should I eat? Not Now. Am I tired, should I sleep? Not Now. Do I have things to do? Not Now. Do I have deadlines? Not Now.
What time is it? Not Now.
What day, what month, what year? Not. Now.